Just wanted to mention this here... & not on my Facebook page, because... well, honestly I don't know why.
Anyway, the past several weeks ... maybe longer, I've been dealing with a bad run of depression. So much that I hadn't even turned on my computer for about 3 or 4 days.
I'm still struggling, even today. All I want to do is watch a little tv & sleep.
It's gotten so bad that my voice is strained... I thought it was from a cold (started last week)... but the more I think about it, I wonder if it's just psychosomatic?? I can talk normally, but after a couple minutes my throat gets sore, & then I end up whispering to keep it from getting worse.
Since I had been sneezing a bit here & there (nothing too bad) I thought it might be allergies. The 1st day when this started, I was to go to PT (for a "frozen shoulder") but was coughing each time I spoke & so, I canceled it, thinking I was getting a cold.
Now that this has been going on for a week, I don't know. Has anyone else had this happen before?
Oh, the only reason I even turned on my computer today was to see if there were storms headed my way & to see if I needed to hurry & get the dogs out. Thankfully not yet.
As anyone knows, when you're dealing with depression, everything suffers... and I'm afraid this time my health is the target now. *sighs*
I'm not posting this to look for sympathy... just seeking advice, I guess. I really don't know.
By the way, don't worry, I'm not in so deep where I'd want to do anything drastic, as to end my life... ABSOLUTELY NOT! I have too many things to live for... besides, my biggest fear, is death. Don't know why since I love the Lord & I believe fully in Jesus!!!
However, that does not stop me from asking God to take me in my sleep to end my suffering & end those in my life's suffering because of my lack of... whatever. Again, I'm NOT going to do it myself... & I know at some point I'll bounce back again... as always.
I'm just very concerned that each time I slip low like this, it's getting worse. *sighs again*
Ok, I'll stop now, because now I have tears in my eyes.
Again, this is not for sympathy! Love you all & thanks for listening! *BIG HUGS!*
