Yeppers... another CONTACT ONLY ENTRY... (half tempted to make it a no reply entry too... because I'm not looking for sympathy... or even pick me up's... I guess I'm just venting a loud.)
Let me just put it this way... My self-esteem has been shot to... pieces (to put it politely!)
Not to mention a long time friendship... (yeah... this is getting to be a recurring theme it seems like here lately on Multiply... but I think it's because we have so many friends here we want to keep you all informed.)
Now.... I am NOT going to mention names! And I am not going to say what happened. But suffice to say... I was shocked beyond all tonight about somethings... I really should have seen it coming... but I didn't... I was blind sided by this!
I knew some things were going on with this person... but I had not a clue how they felt about me. Yeah... sounds a bit selfish... but someone with a low self-esteem to begin with... AND because this is MY blog... I'm going to be.
BUT... It gets worse... I've found out this person has hurt other friends deeply too! I knew about this before I knew about stuff said about me. SO... I feel even horrible that my other friends are going through a rough time because of just one person.
I don't know if this person will even read it... but if so... I just have to say, "I'm praying for you... and had you just said something to me... I could have corrected my end of the problem at least! ... or at least tried to!"
So, anyway... I don't want to assume anything anymore... so, let me say... if you have a beef with ME... please take it up with me! It may hurt at 1st... but I'll get over it! And 9 times out of 10 I don't realize it's wrong... or if it's bothersome to you. I don't know how many times I have to say it... but I am a "people pleaser"... meaning I don't like to irritate people with my habits. Please tell me... because I try to adjust to everyone whenever possible AND when I can't... or slip up... I'll apologize... AND if it's something I have a reason for doing... I'll let you know. AND maybe you'll have a better way for me...
Do you see now? I don't like to anger anyone... so please... talk to me about it!!
Ok... that rant / venting is done (for now!)
On another subject...
It came to my attention the past couple weeks that you all may have gotten the idea (MY FAULT COMPLETELY) that I was terribly sick... I am truly sorry... I tried to explain it... that it was just a head cold and I had no fever... it just really knocked me for a loop. But I think I had the final knock out with it... because today (well, yesterday... Sunday) I started feeling much better!
So... I am so sorry to have worried you. I tend to over do it some times. I do truly appreciate all the concern. Trust me... I will let you know if there would be any concern. I just felt it was necessary to let you all know why I wasn't around much.
And so you know... if it was bad enough, yes... I would have seen a doctor... (if I could wake up for the appointment!! LOL) Sorry... I have to laugh at myself because this is so funny to me that I could not have gone to the doctor at all while I was sick... because I was sleeping the whole time they were open!!
Well, I guess if I was bad enough, I would have made it some how!!! TRUST ME.... I would have gone!!
OH... by the way... if you get one of them head colds this winter... I suggest TheraFlu... NIGHT TIME... SEVERE COLD!! That knocked it out of not just me... but also my hubby AND also my dad... (and he's in California!) So... I know it's going around!! I sure hope you all can stay away from it!!
Ok... that's all for now... my sleeping habits have got to change one of these days!!!!
Night all!! (Look at the time I posted this!!) ;o)